This column is rather heavy on the alliteration, I'm afraid. But, please, give Ps a chance!

I've been increasingly aware of the dominance of a number of personalities (there I go again) who seem to have muscled their way in to the general discourse of the good people (and again) of this town.

Firstly, there are the plague-minimisers and their subterranean cousins, the plague-deniers. For them, COVID19 is either a heavy cold that's fallen in with the wrong crowd and just needs a bit of National Service to straighten it out or an elaborate hoax knitted together with the woven, crushed bones of children by an international conspiracy of capitalists, communists and cosmopolitans.

The former have been vocal recently in poo-pooing (I'll stop now) the recent significant spike in COVID19 infection rates in the town. For them, the fact that many of those infected either lived in or worked in the town's many care homes was proof positive that this was not a community issue.

Clearly, for them these fine homes, which demonstrate the very epitome of dedicated service, are not in 'the' community, by which they seem to mean not part of 'their' community. Bully for them, brother.

Even the leader of Babergh District Council felt for a time it necessary to toe this particular 'don't panic!' line on one of our local social media pages. Thankfully, he's been a little more on message since then.

In my earthly existence, we were surrounded by the little buggers: plagues, pestilence and pandemics (I lied about stopping). Hardly a day went by when myself, Mrs Taylor and the rest of the household didn't have to check each other out for mutual progress reports on the size and colour of our buboes.

But enough of reminisicing about our simple domestic pleasures. (even I'm getting bored now). Whilst we prayed for deliverance, we were as scared about such terrors as we were about taking a skinny dip in the river Brett, or the lavatory as we used to call it.

Until the various vaccines are rolled out and Johnson's all-stars implement a successful rapid turnaround test and trace, caution must be the watchword.

Then there's Hadleigh's little grouplet of conspiracy theorists who believe COVID19 is a pretext to make them take Vitamin D suppositories, stop listening to Placebo and burn their 'I love David Icke' T-shirts in front of real scientists.

I presume it was one of these tinfoil coat-wearers who graffitied the house opposite The Cock pub during the first lockdown with the words "Plandemic".

Chaps – a limp play on words, however neatly stencilled, doesn't really equate to 'evidence' now does it?

Secondly, like ferrets in a pair of corduroys, there's been a lot of politicians shuffling around using ill-judged manoeuvres of late.

This month's Hadleigh Community News carries a bold as brass full page, full colour advert about one Alan 'Bolter' Ferguson. It would appear that Mr Ferguson is the Conservative candidate for Hadleigh in next year's county council elections.

There's nothing inherently wrong with that. Only Bolter Ferguson's selection raises a few questions.

The first is prompted by the fact that he lives in Nedging Tye. Of course, this bijou part of south Suffolk isn't as far away as, say North Carolina, where one of Bolter's predecessors lived whilst purportedly carrying out his ward duties to five-star reviews on TripAdvisor.

But wasn't there anyone who actually lives in the town good enough? Apparently not.

Next, Bolter Ferguson got his nickname, which I've just made up, because ,well, he bolted from the Conservative group on Babergh to become an Independent.

Did he do this out of cast-iron principle or fundamental philosophical objections? Did he go to the stake like me, in other words?

According to an article by the Hadleigh Nub News' editor, he did it because he didn't land the cabinet position he says he'd been promised in a backroom deal with the aforementioned leader of Babergh.

So what's to say, if elected next May, he might not bolt again?

But then, what's happened to the incumbent, Mick Fraser? Was Mr Fraser planning to stand down or was he given an offer to step aside that he couldn't possibly refuse? At least Mr Fraser can stand aside using the dropped kerbs he seems to have funded from his locality budget in recent months. It's not a bad way to go, I suppose.

And finally, onto pork chops. I only raise them because of my admiration for butchers in general (one refused to set me alight at the pyre) and Andrew's in particular.

Andrew and the team have traded successfully and with elan throughout the last nine, challenging months, probably drawing the wrath of the pandemic-deniers and have balanced service with care for customers and staff alike.

During the great orange barrier debate in the summer, Andrew engaged with the issue constructively, with evidence and his trademark gentle, good sense.

Perhaps, if Andrew has the time, he'd care to help sort out the vaccine and test and trace rollouts and then consider standing for next year's election. Please (drat - I did it again).